Good morning world! Is there a difference between dating and sex? I'm amazed at how many people feel casual sex is so bad when it comes to women. Why is it that only men can have casual sex? So if you date a man and you are attracted to him and he is attracted to you, as woman you are supposed to suppress those feelings? That is just crazy to me. I don't understand that. Men and women are sexual beings by nature.
I understand sex is better with someone you care about. But what happens when you care about someone and you become intimate and it's horrible? I've been there and it was an ugly breakup. I really cared for this man. When we were dating he always showed up with a gift for me. Flowers, candy, plant, whatever. I was falling really hard for this man. Then we had sex...it took mere seconds for me to know I was not in love nor could I ever be with this man. I believe in the whole mind, body and spirit connection to another human being. I want to feel connected to the man I'm with in my mind, in my body and in my spirit.
My mind needs to connect with an intelligent man. All of that "you know what I'm saying, you know what I mean, you feel me" crap is not having an intelligent conversation. When I meet supposedly grown men and they speak in that manner I know they are not real men. A real man doesn't have to speak that way. With my body I want to know we both enjoy each other intimately. I am a big girl and have learned to become comfortable in my own skin. Yes, I will have sex with the lights on. Yes, I will walk around in front a man naked. No, I do not feel insecure when becoming intimate with a man. Why? Because I know what I'm capable of. I know who I am. I know what brings me pleasure and joy. Why be ashamed of my body? There are so many men who are just as insecure as women. In my dating journey I have heard many men complain about their own bodies. "My calves, chest, arms, penis...are too small" Believe me, if the penis is too small, he and I would NOT be intimate.
As for spirit connection, does his words touch my soul. Does his life have any meaning? Is he a positive influence in my life? Does his love light shine bright or is it dim because of all his baggage? At the same time I'm asking those questions of a man, I'm asking those same things of myself.
Sure I have my own baggage and I'm working through it all. It's not easy but at least I can be honest with myself. I am single, a big girl, a fun person and I happen to believe there is a difference between dating and sex.
Dating is when a man takes you out, spends money on you for dinner, drinks or movie. Not a hotel. Baby that is sex.
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